A few months ago I asked some of my married friends if they had heard of Tinder.
That last line was definitely to convince me more than them.
There was a long pause, and one said, "like the stuff you use to make a fire?"
I envied their married oblivion.
I laughed. Hard. And then looked around wishing some other poor single fool who had the grotesque pleasure of swiping left and right on the Tinder app was around me to share in the greatness of the moment.
And then I explained what it was.
"It's like a faster, simpler way to date online. It's reducing online dating to be even more superficial. But it's easier and less committed. You swipe left to deny or right to like. If you both swipe right you match and can talk."
Crap. Saying it out loud made it sound even more bizarre than it feels to participate in it.
"But hey, to be fair, I know a few girls who have gotten married to great guys because of Tinder."
My thoughts went to one of those girls, a best dear real good friend who is married to a wonderful kind man. Because of said Tinder.
"It's just how it's done these days".
I thought back to this moment tonight as I was having a conversation (texting of course, I mean duh, we're in our 30's in 2015, so ya) with a guy. He saw one of my friends in a picture and mentioned he knew her.
I of course then began simultaneously texting her. And then I remembered who he was. Oh the stories she had told. Just a nice face with a seedy Tinder moment downfall.
She then began texting him. It's all very inception like and a bit gross. But entertaining nonetheless.
In the meantime, here are a few other quirky nonsensical profile lines of which we judge, laugh, dismiss, then have a moment of 'oh good hell.' Because if you can't laugh you'll cry right? I mean cliches are cliches for a reason.
"I drink a lot of chocolate Nesquik. And I go to church every Sunday." - Lance, age 28
"Pools are perfect for holding water." - Kevin, age 29
"My dating life can be summed up in the lyrics of Miss Fat Booty by Mos Def. Plus my idol is Casey Neistat." -Michael, age 29
there are people who haven't heard of tinder?
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